SOAP: The Alternate Reality - Episode 6

Tate House Basement

<Saunders is shown walking downstairs in the basement. He goes near the pantry where some canned goods are stored.>

Saunders: Never a break in this household.  Those slobs lose a billion dollars and still are hungry.  Soup they ask for.  I'm afraid to serve these animals any kind meal with liquids. 

<Saunders looks puzzled.>

Saunders: Well this is wierd, it seems as if the stove isn't connected down here.  I better check the gas. 

<As Saunders is checking the gas main, he hears something and puts his ear to it.>

Saunders: I still hear the hissing, but I don't smell any gas.  The gas mane has been cut off!!!

Narrator: It turns out Westers and Johnson had cut the gas mane so the bomb would have extra fuel and detonate.  No one realizes in the Tate household that there's a bomb yet.

Danbury

<Johnson blocks Benson, Tom Martin, and Jessica from leaving the building.>

Johnson: Now where do you think your going?

Benson: To the food court, we're starving.

Johnson: Oh really?  Can you pick me up a sandwich?

Benson: Surely.

Johnson: Turkey, American and swiss preferebly. 

Benson: Is that all?

Johnson: I want American on the top.  Now get this right, I'm holding you hostage and you could severly be hurt by messing up my order.

Benson: You're a smart man.

<Johnson leaves them and Benson, Tom and Jessica look at him as if he's braindead.>

Jessica: That guy has more problems then half my family.

Benson: Tell me about it. 

Tom Martin: We better start going, we have only twenty minutes left before the bomb goes off!

Benson: We don't have enough time to save everyone.  They are all going to blow up and there's nothing we can do about it!

Jessica: This is horrible, there must be something we can do!

Tom Martin: Wait, there is!  We can steal Wester and Johnson helicopter and get back to Dunn's River in no time!

Benson:  Great idea!  I still have the bomb plans that I stole earler from them, we will be able to save the Tates.  But Mrs. Tate, I'm sorry to break it to you, but in the confusion of getting everyone out, I may accidently forget to warn Chester that there's a bomb.

Jessica: Oh Benson, you would never do that!  You love Chester.

Benson: Oh yes, that's it.

<Benson, Tom, and Jessica all leave and Westers and Johnson get back into the room.>

Westers: What do you mean they went out for food?

Johnson: Well there's a deli down the street, and I wanted a turkey, american and swiss sandwich!

Westers: You're an idiot!

Johnson: Oh I completely forgot!  Did you want anything?

Westers: Oh it's too late, lets just go and find them!

<A loud noise from the helicopter is heard.>

Westers: They took our helicopter!  We'll take the jeep to our hideout in New York City.  I'll page Leslie and give her the new message shortly.  I can't believe they took our helicopter!

Johnson: Well there was probably traffic getting to the deli!

<Westers knocks Johnson across the back of his head and leaves the room.>

Police Station

Police Officer Tinkler: Well men, we have Dale Westers, Ronald Johnson and Leslie Walker to look out for.  Now this is a search across New England.

Police Officer Danson: Well Tinkler, how do you suppose we find them if we don't know what they look like.

Police Officer Tinkler: That's a very difficult question, and to be perfectly honest, I don't know.  However, we are the best men for the job, and I'm not the Piece of Chelief Tinkler for no reason at all!  They can't run from justice that long.

Helicopter

Tom: The bomb detonate in ten minutes.  We might not make it!

Benson: Then lets speed this thing up, we're almost there!

Jessica: It will be so good to be home again.

Benson: Oh Mrs. Tate, you might not be aware of this, but after the explosion you might not have a home.

Jessica: Oh no!  Who will feed the fish?

Benson: Mrs. Tate, you don't have any fish.

Jessica: But lucky the dog, no one will save him.

Benson: You haven't had a dog in twenty years, and I doubt his name was lucky, much like everything else that ever enters your household.

Jessica: Oh Benson, lets just get there.

Benson: Well I wish Tom would speed this up.

Tom: I can't!  We're running out of gas.  I think I'm going to land this at my house.  I'm only minutes away from your house.  I think we can drive over there.

Benson: Good plan Tom.

Campbells

Chuck: Come on Bob, I can't believe you're acting this way.

Bob: It's very important to become the star of the show.

Chuck: The Tates are in a crisis, we should be over there helping them.

Bob: But we haven't even finished practicing the new act I thought of.

Chuck: And that is....

Bob: Ok here it goes.  I will analyze your signature.

Chuck: If we do this trick, can we then go to visit the Tates?

Bob: Yes.  Now I'm going to sign your name on this piece of paper and you tell me if it matches your signature.

<Bob moves his hand with a pen in it by Chuck.  Chuck starts laughing.>

Chuck: That's not how I write my name!

<Chuck grabs the pen and signs his name on a line.>

Chuck: That's how!

Bob: Thank you!  You've just signed me as the new star of the act.

Chuck: What are you talking about?

Bob: Look below.

Chuck: I hereby declare Bob Campbell the new star of "Chuck and Bob, the two greatest minds at work".  Signed, Chuck Campbell.  Bob you tricked me!

Bob: They don't call me the smarter one for nothing....

Tom Martin's Car

Benson: Lets hurry, we have about five minutes remaining!

Jessica: There will be no time to warn the family this is horrible.

Tom Martin: Don't give up Mrs. Tate, we will save them.

Benson: Just watch the road Tom.

Tom: I'm trying but this person seems to be following us.

<Jessica looks behind the car and sees Leslie is behind them.>

Jessica: Oh no, it's Leslie Walker. 

Benson: Billy's schoolteacher?

Jessica: Well they also went out. You see this is what you miss when you're working at the governors mansion.

Benson: What's she doing back there?

Jessica: Well when Billy broke up with her she couldn't stand living so she tried to killing herself.  That didn't work so now she's trying to kill Billy and basically any of us she can find.

Benson: Sounds like a bigger nutcase then Westers and Johnson.

Jessica: Oh by far.

Tom: A gun just went off!  She has a gun!  We're almost there.  Lets hope no one gets hit...

<The gun fire hits one of the tires of the car.>

Tom: One of the tires went flat!

Jessica: Benson would you be a darling and fix our tire?

Benson: Mrs Tate, I'm a butler, no car repairman!

Jessica: I just thought they were in the same mechanisms....

Tom: We'll be fine I'm speeding up to eighty miles per hour.  We will get there.

Benson: We better, there's only two minutes left.

Jessica: We're home!

Tom: Mrs. Tate the gate is closed to the house.  How do you suppose we open it?

Jessica: Benson, please open the gate.

Benson: I haven't worked here for three years!  I don't have the switch anymore!

Jessica: Oh well the...

Tom: I'm driving right through it!

Benson: You're mad! 

Jessica: So is Leslie, she's still following us!

<The camera shows the car smashing through the gate and getting up to the front door of the Tates House with only about minute remaining.>

Tate House

<Chester has been lying down on the couch for hours and finally wakes up and
starts asking Burt a questions.>

Chester: Do you hear a hissing?  I could have sworn I did.

Burt: You're senile Chester, go back to sleep.

<A crash of the car hits the front door of the Tates House followed by a doorbell.>

Burt: I'll get it Chester, don't worry, just sit on your can and do nothing like you have for the past few days. Oh Chester it's Benson, Jessica, some guy, and Leslie.  I wonder what they all want?

Benson: There's a bomb in the basement that will blow any second.  Get out of the house now!

Tom: Here let me help you Mr. Tate

<Leslie comes up behind Tom.>

Leslie: Actually no, you won't help him.

<Leslie shoots Tom in the back with her gun.  Jessica sees Tom fall to the ground and she knocks the gun out of Leslies hand and punches her in the face.  Leslie is knocked out.>

Benson: Good work Mrs. Tate.  I have cement from Chester's construction company truck in the backyard flowing into the basement so the explosion won't be as serious as it could be.

<Everyone is running out of the house except for Benson who is going back in to help Tom get out.  The camera goes to the detonator that counts down to 1.>

Chester: Well the hissing stopped.

<A shot of the Tates House show a huge explosion wrecking the house.>

New York City

Westers: The bomb went out, everyone in the Tate household has got to be killed.  This is just wonderful!  Now I'm getting on the computer and I am going to plant false evidence on many different computer files so it will look as if Jessica Tate planted the bomb in the Tates house. She will then be charged of arson in her own home.

Johnson: Pure brilliance, now let's go and buy some stuff with Chester's cash!

To Be Continued.....

Announcer: Did everyone escape the Tates House alive? How much damage will the bombing cost the house?  Has Leslie pulled her last stunt on the family?  Has Bob finally fooled Chuck? And will Jessica be arrested and put on trial for the bombing of her own house? These questions and many others may be answered in the next episode of:

SOAP!