Narrator: We continue this episode where we left off. Mary just left in a car with Alien Burt and now Burt is going into the bar to look for her.

<We see Jerry talking with two men by the bar. When Burt walks in he goes over to Jerry thinking he's in charge.>

Burt: Are you in charge around here?

Jerry: What's it to you?

Burt: I'm the sheriff in Dunn's River and my wife was believed to be taken here.

Jerry: And what's your name?

Burt: I'm Burt Campbell.

Jerry: And you say your wife was located around here?

Burt: Yes her name is Mary.

Jerry: Yes we all know about her.

Burt: Oh then where is she?

Jerry: That's not your business anymore buddy and about her being your wife, well we know who you really are?

Burt: But I really am her husband. I can take out documentation right now.

Jerry: That's not necessary.

<Jerry snaps his fingers and two bigger men walk up side by side to Burt.>

Jerry: We promised Mary we'd take care of you if you ever showed your face around here again Burt.

<The two bigger men beat up Burt while Jerry is watching over them. Burt gets up from having a beating and Jerry stares at him right in the eye.>

Jerry: Don't ever step foot in here again Burt.

<Burt gets thrown out of the bar and he is outside. Burt begins speaking to himself.>

Burt: The alien must have gotten here first and told them wrong information. He must have taken off with Mary convincing her he was me. She better be all right.

<Jessica is in her bedroom and Chester comes in.> Chester: Oh Jessica how I love you.

Jessica: What's wrong Chester?

Chester: Nothing it's just when I was in New York City I never realized how much I missed you until then. I never knew I loved you so much.

Jessica: How sweet of you to say.

Chester: Ready to go to bed Jess?

Jessica: Why yes.

Benson: <Screaming from another room.> Chester you have a phone call! Some lady!

Chester: I got it!

<Jessica looks at Chester with a bit of suspicion.>

Chester: Why hello. How are you tonight? Now? No I couldn't make it. I have to be in bed with the wife. I could meet you a little later if you really need me to. Well it wouldn't take me that long with her in bed, it really never does.

Jessica: I know <sounding angry>.

Chester: Where do you want me to meet? Okay see you there soon!

<Chester hangs up the phone smiling and he turns to Jessica with anger all over her face.>

Jessica: Chester Tate who was that?

Chester: Ummm nobody.

Jessica: I know that suave talking Chester and nothing good ever came from it!

Chester: Don't worry Jess nothing is going on. I have to meet this woman, Wanda for a meal at a diner to discuss the stock market. She has a big inside tip which I don't think I even want to share with my clients.

Jessica: Really?

Chester: Really.

Jessica: Look at me right into the eyes and say it.

Chester: Jessica, my wife whom I've loved for my whole life I am being completely faithful to you and if I ever was unfaithful to you I'd stab myself in the eyes twice and cut off all my limbs so I could never feel any sort of enjoyment again.

Jessica: Okay Chester I believe you. Now come to bed.

Chester: Now? I have to take a shower, I need to look nice for Wendy.

Jessica: Wanda.

Chester: That's what I said.

Jessica: You just said Wendy. I'm starting to get suspicious.

Chester: Do you need to see the doctor again Jessica? Your hearing is starting to get awful!

Jessica: You really think so? I haven't gone to a physician since I got the Jessica Syndrome. I've been a little scared.

Chester: I think you should go. Jessica while I'm in the shower can you open the new box of cologne in my top drawer. I need to smell my best for this occassion.

Jessica: I bet!

<Burt walks in the house all bruised and Mary walks out from the kitchen.>

Mary: Burt where have you been?

Burt: Where have you been?

Mary: I was taken away by that alien you and he tried to do tests on me and he wanted me to make love with him. I ran away the second he turned his head. I feel so violated!

<Mary runs and cries into Burt's shoulder.>

Burt: It's okay Mary.

Mary: Okay. You look horrible, you better go upstairs and take a nap.

Burt: I do feel tired. Are you joining me?

Mary: I will shortly.

<Burt goes upstairs and Mary goes into the kitchen. She takes out of the oven some sort of case. She opens it up and there are shots in them. Mary gives herself one. They are the same shots that Alien Burt was composing for himself in the Campbell Basement. This isn't really Mary, it's an Alien Cloned Mary!>

<There is a split screen. Maurice is shown on one side calling. Corinne picks up on the other.>

Corinne: Hello?

Maurice: Hey honey how are you?

Corinne: Great you sound so close to home.

Maurice: Well I soon will be. In two days I'll be coming home. Dad is doing much better.

Corinne: That's wonderful. They weren't too angry when you told them we were married were they?

Maurice: Not anymore. They seem to have a liking for Chester.

Corinne: Wow that's great. You know not many people do.

Maurice: I can tell. How are things there?

Corinne: Pretty calm for this family?

Maurice: How are Eunice and Dutch?

Corinne: Well Eunice left him again and now he's all depressed.

Maurice: That's horrible!

<Dutch picks up the phone and starts dialing a number. The screen is now divided into three screens.>

Maurice: Hello?

Dutch: Hello. Is this America Online? I would like to know how to trace an email address to a house. I'm trying to find my wife.

Maurice: Dutch?

Dutch: Maurice?

Corinne: Hey Dutch we're on the phone.

Dutch: I didn't know Maurice worked for an Internet Company.

Maurice: I don't.

Dutch: Then what are you doing on American Online technical support?

Maurice: What are you talking about?

Dutch: I just called them up and you answered.

Maurice: Dutch I was on the phone with Corinne.

Dutch: Oh I see. When are you coming home buddy?

Maurice: Soon.

Dutch: Great. Corinne is certainly a great girl. She has helped me along my darkest days. I do assume that you know that tramp Eunice left me.

Maurice: So I've heard.

Dutch: Well I'm holding up for the time being I guess.

Maurice: That's good. Do you mind if I continue talking to Corinne now?

Dutch: No problem.

<Dutch hangs up and it goes back to the two person split screen.>

Maurice: He seems to be taking it well.

Corinne: I guess.

Maurice: He's not coming onto you is he?

Corinne: No of course not!

Maurice: Good because he sounded like he had a little crush on you.

Corinne: He acts the same way to daddy.

Maurice: Okay I trust you so I'm not the least bit worried. See you soon honey.

Corinne: Love ya.

<They both hang up the phones and the scene goes black.>

Burt: Mary are you coming upstairs????

<Burt completely walks down and Alien Mary is asleep on the couch. Burt wakes her up. Mary slowly gets up.>

Alien Mary: What are you doing?

Burt: Come upstairs.

Alien Mary: Oh I got confused where our room is. I'm sorry.

Burt: Don't worry about it. Come on upstairs. Actually we should feed Scotty. I'll bring him down. Just get out the food.

<Burt runs upstairs and after thirty seconds he runs back down.>

Burt: Call the police station. Scotty is missing!

To Be Continued....

SOAP!